If no one wants it, it has no monetary value

One of the most difficult tasks of downsizing is the letting go of the stuff that we have accumulated and collected over the course of our lives.  

Last year I spend many, many, many months assisting my older brother who has Parkinson's and the related dementia.  He had been living alone and I was his nearest caretaker, over 200 miles away.  Last year he was persuaded to move to an appropriate setting close to his son and his family in the Seattle area.  In preparation of this a good number of my visits were spent sorting through stuff and making the decisions about what would go with him and what wouldn't.

This was excellent preparation for my own culling process.  When doing this with my brother I came up with some ways to help him, and when deciding about my possessions, to help me, make the choices needed.

A real stumbling block can be "just getting rid of things".  There can be lots of furniture, dishware, flatware, glassware, etc., etc., etc. that was purchased for a dear price and is of excellent style, quality.  The hard thing to accept is that so many of the things my generation has valued are not valued by the current young adults.

It would be easy to turn this into a negative reflection of them, their taste, their choice, their values about what is and isn't important.  But it really isn't a value judgement, it is a reflection of fashion and lifestyle.  Younger generations have over and over again rejected what their elders held dear, so this is not a new phenomenon.  And we elders need to cut them some slack.

It is okay that they don't want the stuff we have.  And it is okay that they don't find it lovely and attractive and compelling as we do.  Our liking and appreciating it doesn't make us "better" and their not liking and appreciating it doesn't make them "not as good".  It simply makes all of us who we are.

The often difficult part to accept, when thinking about letting go of items and considering selling them is this; if no one wants it, regardless of what it might of cost, it simply has no monetary value.

The way I helped my brother (and now help me) get beyond that was to pose the question, "was it purchased as an investment, did you buy it because it would increase your assets and wealth".  For all the stuff in the house the answer was no.  My next question was, "Did you enjoy owning it, using it, looking at it; did it give you pleasure?".  And the consistent response was, yes.  So, I concluded, you got your money's worth out of it, enjoyed it, and now, it is simply time to gracefully let it go.

I know this is true for me.  And think it might be true for most.  I did not purchase my furniture, pots, dishes, jewelry, decor items as investments.  I got them because I liked them.  I lived with them, enjoyed how then enhanced my home or my day-to-day living.  That no one else may want to spend any money on them is simply the way it is.  I had my pleasure and letting go is simply okay. 

Next, okay I can let go, but of what?

Comments

Popular Posts